trip report first major trip
trip report first major trip :
setting : my room
hope I will find the right words to describe this experience
It was my first heroic dose 5g trip with PESA mushrooms.
Prior to preparing anything I did short yoga 30min sesh which sets my mind to the right direction, I walways feel this connectivness, oneness after doing yoga, It feels like Im a plant or some kind of tree capable of moving but I still have very deep root to the earth and similar connection to the universe. I hope somebody can relate.
I always use tea as a method of preparing I also fasted before ingesting the shroomies. The fast consist of just a light breakfast, I think a person can eat maybe very light meal/lunch too.I never fasted before so I was quite hungry but I always drinked lot of water and oils like olive oil or any similar preferably healthy oil would do the trick with the hunger in the morning. At the evening I prepared cleared the place(corners of room, tools I used, myself too with white sage incense/corners, then I quickly, but very calmly prepared my bed and blankets. Those blankets were the most important thing to have, which I found out later on. After doing all this stuff I dranked the prepared tea. Taste was really strong, I remember it was quite hard to swallow because when I swallowed the tea I felt that the tea taste is tremendeously strong. After few sips and finishing of the cup I ate the shroomies. Then I set my intention to let go of everything which I didnt needed and most importantly to connect to most highest creative force of the universe. I was aware that something like this exist, but not to this level of experience. I had some experience with ancient india/yogic meditation
called kundalini which represents the creative force of the universe. I use brainwave entertainment to get into deep meditation and also to raise the kundaliny energy. It does have some specific breathing techniques which can fireup the lifeforce/cosmic serpent within us.Ater the kundalini meditation I felt great, energised, even through I felt the strong comming up of the shroomie trip. I did one more brainwave ent. meditation which was designed to activate healing state of the body. The trip started to and was very heady, the visuals started to blast my head. I convinced somehow myself that I didnt came for the visuals and insisted on my intention and holded up on to it and kindly asked mushrooms If that can be fulfilled. I was very exhausted at this point, because of the strong trip, I could barely hold in that meditation position so I left to my bed. After laying down I felt how the trip started to get even more and more stronger. I got very cold, started to shivering. The blanked was like gold or diamond in this moment. The cold shivering left and I felt like I was traveling or somehow trying to get to the place where my intention can be fullfiled( better said it was like traveling towards it). Around me during the journey I felt these kind of forces/beings, which doesnt want to allow me to go to that place. The speed of my traveling increased more and more and I felt getting closer and closer, these forces which were like some dark entities which doesnt want me to allow, I fighted them because I only wanted to communicate with the highest spirit, force. Their force they tried to entangle me with was getting stronger. And I remember the feeling very exhausted from this it was like neverending fight and then after short while I cannot take the beatings of this energy/forces any longer. The whole process of this fight felt like I was slowly dying and getting destroyed
I cried and I felt that there is nothing I can do, that I loosed and now Im going to die. I finaly surrender, kind of accepted that there is nothing can do and that I put everything into this and got no more fuel to go. After doing this something very very peculiar happened, the forces being that I felt endangered by was gone. Then some tremendeously high power of energy just started to accumulate at the base of the spine, It was filling and filling with the energy to the point It was overwhelming, I didnt knew if I shitted my pants or not, but it felt like it, very warmth lol. The feeling doesnt came of, it was only increasing and increasing. I felt it moving in upward trajectory, jolts of energy, spontainious jerks, body movements accompanied this feeling. Its kind of stupid to compare it to getting to the orgasm, but the feeling was very similar.
The energy reaches the point where it get so overwhelming that I couldnt not handle it and I lost complete control of myself, well it felts like complete surrender and losing myself. Its kind of stupid to compare it to getting to the orgasm, but the feeling was very similar. Afterwards the accumulated energy from the base of the spine shoots of straing to the third eye and above through the crown. I finaly felt like this is where it supposed to happen, Im finaly arrived, I finaly get into contact I trusted my intuituion and feelings this was not a harmful kind of energy . This highest creative energy felt very womanly, very kind, like a true mother love. I started to communicate by thoughts and this energy started to answer with a voice. The voice inside said to my question : what is a purpose of human existence : It is love, this was accompanied with very strong feeling of oneness and it started to showing me images of my family and it said to me, you are all one, all one being. It begins to uncover the answers to all questions that I asked. It taught me throught this images feelings and sayings that we are all one and we are all part of one energy which is our true nation and it is love,but it was a kind of love that most people arent aware of, the real love unconditional one, like a very strong love from a mother, most importantly it was absolutely pure without the attachment. After this teaching I realized that the love as I used to know was very fake. It taught me that this energy of love is always around us and within us and all the living things around us, but some creations due some circumstances unplugged from this source of everything, and by doing they losing the point of existence and that they can be plugged in back only when they experience this love or being trully loved. My next question was how would I help the world and myself. It was showed to me that only resolution of every issue most come from heart from the place of this love and that I can help others by creating love from within and plug them in back to this primordial source of energy, this experience was followed by a feeling that I was some kind of reptile or snake due to way my my tongue moved and bit felt insane, and next that all people have this similarity but we have this divinity within us, some creations plugged of from the divine source due to self doubt or self hatred or other circumstance but there is always a chance to get back and plugg in and the decision is up to us. Then I saw the slow motion of a place in forest where mushrooms started to begin and slowly grow. This divine energy showed me that a nature have the keys/hardware to connect us back and now Im doing it. And the mushies kindly told me the message please spread us. Next question was on my mind. What is an existence to mushroom itself :
the answer was pure joy. Then the trip started to come down slowly, I decided to go to pee, most importnaltly to check my pants and I felt very very exhausted so I come back to bed and felt asleep. After two hours or even less I woke up all soaked up in sweat, my clothing bedding sheets, blankets even under the bedcloth there was my body structure imprinted with sweat on the matrace. What was really surprisng to me was that I didnt knew for how long I was asleep and when I found out I was shocked because I felt greatest ever, very energised, ready to do things lol. I also felt an urge, or it was coming out from me spontainiously that I need to spread love, I prepared the breakfast for everybody which was very unusual with me and waited for my mom to show up with a huge smile on my face and dillated pupils also. The day started beautifully, day after day felt like I reborn as a new person. Itrully enjoyed the smallest things in life and I was happy. From this moment I dont like when somebody starts to bring out, better said create fear. One of the lessons was also that the subconscious fear was destroying my whole life and the life of others and it kept me away from trully living. Im very thankfull for being alive again. I think if somebody wants to experience shroomies, the person should do preparation with huge respect towards the medicine and most importantly have a strong intention and pure, light heart, and surrender to all that you experience +breathe +observe things before reacting and it will never harm you in any way
wishing a safe and meaningfull, profound journeys to everyone
ps The insanity feeling didnt take longer, but I remember the feelings during revalations were that strong that I cried with a smile from happiness.
The experience what I felt when I was feeling insane was only comparable to this, and yes I was was underneath